Monday, August 25, 2008

Life With Emma

It's been a couple weeks since we've been home now. I'd like to say we have a routine down, but we don't. Getting blog time is hard. In fact, Emma is sitting on my lap as I type!

I know there are many of you out there still following the blog, so I'll keep updating with stories when I get a chance. This week I'm trying to register Emma in school. It's been hard. No one is sympathetic to our situation. Basically it looks like we'll just have to put Emma in grade one. The schools tell us it is quite an issue to get a child into a special program. There needs to be "documentation"...and a lot of it before a school will shell out extra $$$ for special needs kids. There is one school (not in the public system) who is going to do some research for me to see if we can place Emma in one of their special classes. We'll see how it goes. Hopefully we'll know before next week because that's when school starts!!

So, I know everyone out there likes to hear stories about gross here goes...Emma's poop story!....
We suspect Emma may have intestinal parasites (very common among orphanage kids) so our doctor requires 2 stool samples. We were given 2 little vials full of liquid and a screw-on cap with a little scoop attached. Our job...fill the vials with poop using the little scoop and stir it into the liquid. Sounds easy, right? Problem do we get this poop? It is not allowed to touch water or urine.

Day 1.....
Emma wakes up and goes to the toilet and is going pee. I ask her if she needs to poop..she says "da" (yes) So here mom comes with a paper plate wondering how I'm going to get Emma to squat over it and poop. I simply asked her to do it and to my amazement she immediately squats over the plate. I was very elated that everything was going so well, but all she did was squat there for a few minutes..she didn't have to poop. Later that day...same thing happens again. She will happily squat over the plate, but obviously she is not entirely sure what "poop" means. Round 3...Emma is peeing on the toilet and I ask her if she has to poop. She says "nyet" so I leave her alone. Next thing I know, she's calling me to wipe her bum as she's laid a great big one in the toilet!!! Round 4...same thing happens again. I give up on day 1.

Day 2......
I decide to try a new method...saran wrap over the toilet seat. I punch a hole in it for the pee to drain and leave it there to catch anything else that's coming out. Emma finds this very amusing. In fact, every time she goes to the toilet, she brings me the saran wrap and wants me to put it on the toilet for her. Round 1, 2, and 3...only pee. Round 4 and 5 were while we were out shopping and, of course, she pooped both times. That's it for day 2!!!

Day 3...... SUCCESS!! And the best part about it...Terry was home!!! I somehow conned him into scooping the first sample telling him we each have to do one. Well, this poop was so huge, I'm surprised the saran wrap could hold it!!! And here's poppa, scooping little spoonfuls into the vial, gagging the whole time..trying not to lose his lunch. It was hilarious!!
Next poop it was my turn. Luckily it was just little pieces that were very easy to get into the vial. And I have a much stronger stomach than problem! He got off lucky, though, because I was the one who got peed all over this morning as I got Emma to pee in a cup for a urine test!
Emma found all of this collecting pee and poop quite amusing. In fact, as poppa was doing his scooping, she's in the background yelling "STINKY, YUCKY!" and laughing her little head off.
OK! Enough talk about number 1 and number 2. I hope you all had a good laugh over this one!

1 comment:

  1. Forgive me for laughing. Miriam had to read over my shoulder as I was reading from the recliner. I do admire the way you continue to keep your sense of humor in life’s unpleasant circumstances. As I was laughing I was thinking about David making two trips to the courthouse outhouse. One peepee and one poop.
    Kirby & Miriam, Leah and David